I found a generator on the SCP website. I want a damned sandwich, as you can all tell.
CLASSIFIED BY ORDER OF O5-█
Item #: SCP-17-J
Object Class: Safe
Special Containment Procedures: SCP-17-J is to be kept in a Sandwich-lined containment chamber located in Toys 'R' Us, where it is to be guarded at all times by no less than 3 Aviators armed with sandwiches.
In the event that SCP-17-J ever begins snuggling its uvula, Sir Sandwich is to poke SCP-17-J until it ceases its behavior. In the event of a containment breach, Mobile Task Force Omega-7 (''Grimm'') is to be dispatched to SCP-17-J's last known location.
Description: SCP-17-J is a delicious bunny rabbit. Like most members of its species, it is able to grow sandwiches, and regularly eats twice its own weight in Sandwich each day.
SCP-17-J's unusual properties manifest whenever it comes in contact with sandwiches, which causes it to turn into sandwich. Whenever this happens, all sandwiches within a 42 kilometer radius will begin to detonate uncontrollably, usually leading to civilian casualties.
In addition, many researchers feel it has an uncanny resemblance to that guy who invented sandwiches. Whether or not this is at all related to SCP-17-J's anomalous properties is unknown at this time.
Recovery Log: SCP-17-J was first located in Pyrehill where the Seattle Seahawks were using it in order to steal all sandwiches. Thankfully, Mobile Task Force Omega-7 (''Grimm'') was able to recover the object with only 382247104873290178900718937289478930174890372148907389274893 civilian casualties.
Addendum: Test Log 17-1
Dr. Kreiser: Ello? Ello? Is zhis thing on? Ach, good. Zhis is Docktorr Kreiser, and I am about to test SCP-17's reaction to Sandwich. Are you ready to proceed, Docktorr Atwood?
Dr. Atwood: Yes sir, ready to begin test.
Dr. Kreiser: Excellent! I am now introducing the Sandwich to 17... hmm, zhe subject seems to have already figured out zhe test material.
Dr. Atwood: Making a note; 'subject shows high capacity for learning'.
Kreiser: Now zhe subject is lookink right at me, almost as if it... MEIN GOTT! MEIN charming personality! IT'S GOT MEIN charming personality! OH ZHE AGONY! ZHE AGONEEEEEEEEEEEEY!
In light of incident 17-J-1, testing has been suspended indefinitely. - O5-█